Eternal
by Riptide2
Summary: Percy's been missing for months and Annabeth is beginning to question everything. So when the world pushes down on her, can she find the strength to push back? Lost Hero 'verse. AU to my other PJO stories.


**Author's Note:** This story is a one-shot that's AU to all my others. My other stories are set as if The Lost Hero never happened, where this one is a TLO/SON 'verse. Thanks, Riptide2

Eternal

She hates the way they look at her now, like she's a glass teetering on the edge, constantly edging closer to breaking - to shattering into a thousand tiny pieces that'll never truly be whole again. Sometimes she wonders if this hasn't already happened and it's just her own stubborn pride that keeps her from admitting the truth of the matter.

She isn't whole without him. It's as simple as that. He completes her, and vice-versa. She's the voice of reason that stops him from doing something stupid and getting himself killed. She worries about what he might do without her. It's pointless - energy wasted on something she can't control that could be spent on her work. Or at least that's what she tells herself. He's invulnerable after all. But she realizes the risks more than anyone. A lucky stab, a glancing blow off the place only she knows...

But just like she's the voice of rational thought - something he never was good at - he grounds her, reminds her she's human. That sometimes following your heart, letting emotion rule your decisions, isn't all bad. Without his nagging recklessness, that deal-with-the-consequences-later attitude of his that drove her nuts at times she's starting to slip away from feeling anything at all, but of course she'll never admit to it.

She drives herself deeper into the planning but at night, in that moment just before sleep over takes her.

Then she lies awake thinking about him and just as always the 'what ifs' haunt her. What if he's dead? What if she's wrong and he isn't with the Romans? What if, what if, what if… Her ADHD mind conjures up scenarios each worse than the one before it. But the one that kills her: what if he doesn't remember her?

But with him gone, she's the one everyone looks to and she can't afford to let her emotions - her fears - show because as much as she wishes it weren't so, there are some who doubt he's ever coming back and without him she's their leader now.

So while she goes through her day she gives nothing away - no outward sign of weakness. But that doesn't mean she misses the few that know her best watching with worry in their eyes whenever they think she doesn't see. Their furtive glances as she swallows a few bites of her already cold dinner only serve to drive her farther away and she leaves as quickly as humanly possible to stare blindly at calculations that could have waited till morning.

So when the old centaur comes looking for her, she already knows what he's going to ask. With computer like exactness she makes her way through the pleasantries all the while wondering when he'll get to the point of his visit. Finally the question she's beginning to hate comes, "Annabeth, are you alright? You've been a tad over worked as of late." He asks with genuine concern in his voice and she knows he's seen just how much this is killing her on the inside.

He's known her long enough to see through the stormy gray eyes that are strictly void of all emotion to the soul beneath. He doesn't miss the fact that she barely eats, or the fact that the dark circles under her calculating gray eyes are bigger than he's ever seen them. And the thoroughly chewed nails only add to his worry.

She doesn't turn, for a moment gives no indication that she actually heard him. Just rustles her latest diagrams, tilts the 3-D model of the Argo II, but finally she answers, "I'm fine. I've just been busy."

Her voice is stiff, more mechanical than human, and he sighs wishing there was something – anything - more he could do than offer a shoulder and a listening ear he knows she won't accept. She nods once in response to his offer and after a moment his goodbyes, but otherwise ignores his very presence, once again taking refuge in herself. As he's heading out the door, silently shutting it, he's praying to the gods that this gamble of Hera's was worth it.

It's weeks later and she's standing in the cave/workshop of Bunker 9. It's huge - practically the size of a small warehouse and most of the room is filled with the beam of solid wood that makes up the mast of their half-completed Argo II resting precariously on wooden sawhorses. The rest is covered in tables overflowing with blueprints. She eyes the rag-tag group in front of her consisting of Cabin 9, Jason, Leo, and Piper questioning if they can take the hard news she has for them. It's late and they've been working on the mast for almost 24 hours straight but no matter what they do it won't stand correctly on the deck. They had finally dragged it back here and examined every inch of the pine log for the flaw after which Leo had loudly cursed and announced that there _'wasn't a thing the matter with the damn mast'_ as he'd so colorfully put it. She'd found the problem, of course. The problem that wasn't in the mast at all but instead in the supports they'd built into the lower decks of the ship. They were off, only marginally mind you, barely a fraction of a degree, but that fraction still meant that they would have to be replaced. It would take weeks to make and install new supports. Of course they were already a month ahead of schedule so it wouldn't affect their plans too much, but to her it's just another in a string of delays that convince her that gods don't really want her to find him and in her mind she's cursing them for making her wage this one person battle to not only save the world but, more importantly in her eyes, to save him.

Piper's voice brakes into her thoughts, shattering her internal tirade, "Well, what's the matter with this thing?" Her voice is exhausted, the way they all feel, and she's leaning against Jason's chest to stay on her feet.

She squashes the flash of jealousy the moment it arises at the sight of them together, happy. Something she's not entirely sure she'll be again, not that she'd ever admit her doubts as she stomps on that thought too, adding it to the pile of worries that still creep into her thoughts and threaten to brake her down despite her best efforts to keep them at bay.

Jason clears his throat rather pointedly and she forces herself to stay in the present, to lock her emotions away. As she delivers the news the others express their disbelief and disappointment in a chorus of groans and angry mutterings, but she's calm, cool, the picture of professionalism, and her expression never changes.

Until the daughter of Hephaestus, Nyssa speaks up, "And what if we get all this done and Percy isn't there and the Romans refuse to help us? What do we do then?"

Her eyes narrow dangerously and those in between the two girls back away slowly, unwilling to get in the daughter of Athena's way and incite her wrath, as she turns the full effect of her glare to bear on the slightly younger girl. She hisses her curse in Ancient Greek, "_Go to the crows." _But in the back of her mind the chilling voice of Gaia whispers, _Well Annabeth? What will you do then? What will you do without your hero, my child?_

_I am __**not **__your child. _She responds immediately, denial rising in her almost before the words register.

_Oh, but you are. You are, and one day you'll come to realize that I am the mother of all, even you and the son of Poseidon._ The voice is fading, cackling with laughter, before she can deny it.

Externally her strong facade nearly cracks. "He'll be there." She answers spontaneously, but her eyes flash with desperation and just for a second her doubts show before her expression hardens and she turns away cursing her eyes for betraying her.

The daughter of Hephaestus backs away, letting it drop. The first person to ask that question promptly met with the end of Annabeth's dagger, while the next few had been vehemently cursed to Tartarus and back in several languages, but the worry and fear that she'd seen in that instant had frightened her more than the fierce wrath the others had met with. She catches the others' eyes and shrugs helplessly. It's not like she can force the other girl to confide in one of them, though she might be tempted to try if she thought it would work. In her opinion machines are a hundred times easier to work with then people.

As Annabeth stands with her back to them she's building the wall that keeps her emotions at bay even higher, berating herself for being so weak, so emotional. Internally, she's forcing herself not to think about the variables, the million things that could go wrong and knowing both their lucks probably will. Instead she's running though the reasons why it will go according to plan. Because this is her plan and she's never wrong. They've beat all the odds before, and they can and will do it again. Because they're both stronger then the gods give them credit for, because this time even Hera's gone too far. Because she's the daughter of Athena, the wise one, and he's the idiot, Seaweed Brain, son of Poseidon, and together they're unstoppable. Because their love may be a forbidden one but it's also an eternal one.

She lets that thought echo around in her mind and drive her fears and doubts away_._ Suddenly she's straightening, whirling on them as they silently debate how to help her, and they stare at her in surprise as she thrusts tools and equipment into their hands before grabbing her own.

Piper blearily regards her, "Where are you going? It's three in the morning."

Piper's face is smeared with grime and the complete disbelief in her voice causes Annabeth to smirk, though it's hidden because she's facing the door instead of them.

"Let's go! We've got work to do." She says as if that were the completely obvious answer.

It's three months later now almost to the day and her slave driving has paid off. She's ignoring the crowd of people gathered around the docks to see them off, brushing off those trying to congratulate her on finishing the Argo II months ahead of schedule thanks to her almost obsessive planning, weaving through the well-wishers that are quite frankly just wasting her time until...

"Annabeth, hey Annabeth, wait up!" It's her brother's voice. She tries to push down her irritation; all she wants is to be away from here and their sympathetic glances and almost constant barrage of inquiries on her well-being.

"Malcolm," She greets him, turning with a forced smile. His face is flushed and that and the fact that she's been avoiding him all day betray his search across Camp for her.

He opens his mouth to speak but she cuts him off, "Before you ask, I'm fine." Internally she's cursing whoever invented those three little words that spell out _Are you okay?_ If one more person asks her that she's sure she'll scream for the entire world to hear the lie that she isn't breaking on the inside.

He smiles knowingly, "I wasn't going to, but ok."

She rolls her eyes and barely resists the urge the stick her tongue out at her slightly older sibling. He always knows how to make her feel better. "Don't worry; I won't let anyone mess up your books while you're gone."

She laughs lightly, letting her worries slip away if only for a few moments, "You better not."

He shakes his head, smiling. That wouldn't be a problem. All their other siblings _knew_ there'd be hell to pay if they touched her books without permission. It was practically an unspoken law. Then he stops remembering why he had been looking for her all morning.

As he brings the small, gray velvet, box out from behind his back, her eyes widen and she's shaking her head before he can open his mouth. "Malcolm, I can't."

He knew this was coming, but he can be every bit as stubborn as her if he chooses to be. They _are_ siblings after all, if only half. "Yes, you can and you will. I want you to have this."

She shakes her head again, "Malcolm..."

"Annabeth..." He pushes on with a slight smirk. If she wants to make this a battle of wills, he's game. But he's also betting she's tired enough after weeks of sleepless nights to just give in, if only to humor him.

She eyes the box reluctantly and he adds, "Please, Annabeth. Promise me you'll use it."

She hesitates for just a second before taking the velvety box and pushing back the lid. Inside his sterling silver astrolabe glints in the sudden sunlight reflecting off the diamond accents. A magic gift from his mother Athena on his twelfth birthday it automatically guides the user to the safest path.

She fingers the delicate circle of silver and looks up to meet his stormy-gray eyes that are so much like her own, "Malcolm, are you sure? I know how much this means to you and..."

"And I want you have this." He says a hint of his own stubborn streak showing. "I trust you. Let it guide you back to him."

Suddenly her doubts are back, threatening to break through the barrier she's erected to keep them at bay, and Gaia's voice is back too, seeping through the cracks in her defenses. Like sand pouring through a crevice it's a poison that's beginning to infect her mind and she's not sure how much longer she can hold it off.

With mocking kindness it's taunting her, _Are you really so naïve to believe that the cunning of Athena is a match for me, my child? Oh, it would an act of mercy to kill you now before you have to watch the death of your loved ones, so tragic. And it's all so very needless…_

Even as she's cracking, her defiance is as instinctual as breathing and she hisses, _Take your mercy and shove it._

Gaia's laughing as if she's watching something pleasant, _so fierce! So spirited! Perhaps you are a true daughter of the mighty Athena. But you are also blinded by your love of the gods. It is a shame. I would have loved to keep one as feisty as you around as a pet._

The voice is gone before the murderous, Greek curse is even off her lips.

She focuses outward again as Malcolm's slightly stunned voice cuts through her thoughts like a knife, "Hey! It wasn't me that touched your laptop!"

She blushes furiously to realize she'd spoken out loud, "No! I'm sorry, it's just..." Abruptly her shoulders sag and a single tear is sliding down her cheek before she can stop it. She swipes at it quickly, but her brother's eyes narrow and she knows that he's seen. She tries to force the emotion out of her expression but Gaia's words ring in her ears "_an act of mercy to kill you now"_ and her composure slips.

A few more tears push past her eyelids and with grim understanding in his eyes, her brother wraps his arms around her.

He holds her as she silently berates herself, cursing every tear that falls unbidden from her eyes. She struggles to lock her emotions back in, to pull her completely professional composure back up, and he squeezes her tighter as a sob breaks out.

"It's ok, Annabeth. You don't have to go through this alone." Her brother murmurs in her ear, but abruptly she's aware of the crowd bustling around them and it's not ok.

Gently she slips out of his arms and bobs her head in pretend agreement, knowing she just doesn't have the energy for an argument, although inside she knows she can't afford to let herself go to pieces again. Leaders are impassive, unfeeling, and that's what she has to be now because if she isn't then that pompous, over-confident, son of Jupiter will take over and, maybe it's her pride again, but she just _knows_ he'll mess up her plan.

Externally her mask is up again and she shrugs sheepishly, "Sorry. I got you all wet."

He shrugs it off; staring at her is if to make sure she won't shatter.

She sighs, "You don't have to worry about me. I'll be fine." But she knows better than to believe that he won't and she's proven right, as always.

He instantly shakes his head, "Yes. I do. I'm your brother, 'Beth."

She narrows her eyes at the nickname from when she was younger, but he changes the topic before she can comment.

Snapping the velvety lid shut over his prize possession, he holds the box out to her. "Promise me you'll use it."

She reluctantly accepts, seeing the determination in his eyes and slips it into the laptop bag that's slung over her shoulder, "I promise."

Satisfied that at least he's offered her all the help he can, he smiles and catches her in another quick hug before grinning, "I'd wish you luck but with all the planning you've been doing, you won't need it."

She returns his grin, savoring in the moment for a few minutes. "Now get going! You've got a boat to catch and a world to save."

They share a high-five and she slips into the crowd, heading for the boat that she's put so much effort into.

Once she's by the docks she scans the crowd and the person she's looking for isn't hard to find. Chiron's making his way toward her and she runs to meet the old centaur who's more of an adoptive father than trainer after raising her from the time she was seven.

As she hugs him, he chuckles and the sound brings back so many happy memories that she can almost forget the situation at hand.

"I could not be prouder of you, Annabeth." He smiles down at her and she beams, feeling oddly like a little kid again. "And while I have no doubt in your abilities, I do hope you will be careful."

She squashes the urge to roll her eyes, "I will be. I promise."

He nods thoughtfully and she can tell there's something more on his mind, "Chiron..."

"You must go, child, but before you do I feel as though I must warn you to be careful around the Romans. They cannot be trusted. Mark my words."

Her brow furrows, does he mean the Romans in general or Jason specifically? She opens her mouth to protest but the call of a horn signaling the departure of the Argo II cuts her off.

Chiron smiles and hugs her again, "I care about you a great deal, Annabeth. For my sake, please, be careful."

"I'll be careful. I promise." She repeats and the worry in his eyes eases but doesn't leave.

"Now you must go, my child." And while his words may be like Gaia's she smiles at the care and - love in his eyes, and hugs him one last time.

"Goodbye, Chiron, for now."

He nods and clasps her on the shoulder, and as she's weaving through the crowd and boarding the Argo II, she has to wipe away a tear that has nothing to do with Gaia's taunts.

She waves until the shore line of Long Island Sound is long out of view before turning to the others. She catches Leo's eyes and he cracks a grin before hollering, "Let's get this show on the road!"

It's the next day before she pulls out Malcolm's magical gift and she's standing on deck, clutching the silver astrolabe as they glide through the water off the coast of Delaware. She can feel the others' anxious glances as they wait for orders from her that they don't really need but she doesn't turn from her position by the dragon masthead. Finally the sound of wooden planks creaking as Leo Valdez fidgets provokes her answer, "Full sail. Steady as she goes."

The whistle and crack of canvas unfurling and the padding of their feet as they carry out her commands, cause her to sigh. If Percy were here he could have the entire ship under his command in seconds, and even better in her mind, she wouldn't have to listen to the son of Jupiter's domineeringly foolish plans.

While she knows the meeting with the Romans could go badly, very badly if she wants to be honest, from what she's seen, if they're all like Jason, she can outmaneuver them blindfolded. So she doesn't bother to engage in his hopeless planning, instead she's running over what Chiron had said to her, _they cannot be trusted. Mark my words._

It hadn't seemed like he was talking about Thalia's purple clad brother and Chiron certainly hadn't shown any animosity towards the leader of the Roman legions but perhaps he had been simply keeping his enemies close. But then again Jason hadn't done anything but help them, even if he couldn't come up with a single sound plan.

She shakes her head, it's impossible to rule out the variables without all the facts. She'll just have to wait and let their actions speak for them.

Starring out at the expanse of roaring blue on every side of them, she lets her thoughts drift and suddenly she's all too aware that she doesn't have all the facts about Percy's current location either and while the Romans are the obvious answer, the obvious answer isn't always the right one, but he _is_ out there somewhere. He's alive and that's all that matters.

As she stares down at her hand, at the tiny sapphire and silver promise ring on her finger, she can hear the words he spoke that day so clear that for a second she has to remind herself that he isn't right there with her saying them all over again.

"_We'll be together forever, Annabeth. I'll never leave you."_

_She laughed, happy just to be with him, "And risk the wrath of Athena?"_

_"For you," He boldly declared, "any day."_

_Thunder rumbled in the distance and he winced as she broke out in fresh laughter._

She clutches the ring as she smiles at the memory. "You promised, Percy. And I'm going to hold you to that."

Jason's voice behind her brakes through her remembered happiness as he asks, "Don't you think you ought to prepare yourself for the possibility that he might not be coming back?"

She bits back a growl of rage and turns on him with fire in her eyes. To her satisfaction, he grimaces and backs away, if only a step. "He'll be there."

Going back to the bliss of the memory, she turns to face the ocean once again and ignores him.

"_What! It isn't that funny!" He huffed._

"_You should have seen your face!" She gasped out, leaning on his shoulder as another round of laughter hit her. "It was hilarious!"_

_He huffed again in mock irritation, "I come down especially on your birthday and this is what I get?"_

_She struggled to keep a straight face as she turned to kiss him, sliding her fingers into his unruly black hair._

"_Better now?" She asked pulling away with a smirk._

"_Well... maybe a little..." He teased, pretending to think about it._

"_Seaweed Brain," She shrieked, using her knowledge of his only weakness against him as she caught him in a headlock with one finger dancing over the small of his back._

"_Hey! No fair!" He squirmed as her dancing fingers met their mark._

"_I never said I was going to be fair." She taunted, moving her hand away just enough that he relaxed before starting again._

She pulled the ring off to read the words she knew by memory engraved on the inside of the band. _Seaweed Brain & Wise Girl forever._

"_Did you mean it?" She demanded, still not letting him go._

"_Mean what?" He asked struggling._

_She rolled her eyes. Half the time she was sure his head was full of kelp. "What you said, about us being together forever?"_

_He was suddenly still and when she met his eyes the power in his sea green ones made her shiver, "Every word."_

_Then he twisted, wrenching out of her grasp, and she shrieked, "Cheater! I'll get you for that..."_

She tips her chin to the sky, let's the sunlight glow over her, warming her skin, "You promised Percy, and there's no way in Hades I'm letting you get out of it!"

"You'll see!"

"_You'll see..."_


End file.
